Is Ben a monkey?

Benjamin is not as far removed from the monkeys, evolutionarily, as the rest of us, it seems. He. will. climb. anything. It's really bad. Danny was a climber, but nothing like this. Ben has already had three black eyes, more bruises than can be counted (including a big one on his cheek) and several scrapes that are all the result of falling off of something high.

He can scale the couch. He has figured out how to pull the dining room chairs out from the table so he can get up on them. Occasionally, he tries to get up on the table. To avoid this, I have now tied the legs of the chairs to the table legs with Wal-Mart bags, so that he cannot pull the chairs out. He likes to stand (with no hands) on top of the dog food bin. He and Danny like to climb from the loveseat to the recliner onto the end table, flop onto the couch, then slide off only to run over and do it all again...endlessly...giggling the whole time. Ben desperately wants to figure out how to climb up onto our bar stools...the other day, I saw him trying to move toy buckets over there so he could use them as step stools to get onto a bar stool. He's nothing if not resourceful.

In addition to climbing, he also loves to get up on his tiptoes to pull random things out of drawers that don't have latches on them yet or to pull things off of the kitchen counters. I have not put a latch on the silverware drawer yet...didn't know he could reach inside it until last week when he (I swear to God) had a butcher knife in his hand when I looked over. BABY PSYCHO! Just now, Kevin had to come running because he had opened another drawer and had a long ribbon of postage stamps strung out.

I cannot leave the room for more than 10 seconds at a time. I cannot turn my back on him for more than 20 seconds at a time. I am exhausted from stalking him. Laundry is piled up. Dishes are getting washed on an as-needed basis.

This week he has had a little cold, plus he is getting THREE teeth all at once. He is snotty. He is mucus-ey. He is coughy. He is whiney. He is clingy. He sleeps with us every night and coughs directly in my face because he wants to sleep on my pillow, pressed up against me as tightly as possible.

Ben is under the impression that he needs to do everything better than Danny did at that age. Danny climbed a little bit...Ben's an all out mountain climber. Danny didn't sleep through the night for a long time...Ben refuses to sleep, especially alone...going on 15 months here. Danny spit up a few times as a baby...Ben spit up a few times an hour for nine months and still occasionally hurls for no apparent reason.

I love both of my boys with every bit of my heart...but they are both giving us a run for our money. Why is this so hard? Is it just a boy thing? Are girls easier babies? Is there any way I can get through this without losing my mind?